A couple weeks ago we had our 20 week ultrasound to find out
the sex of our little one. It’s a boy! Jeremy was wrong, haha, not that I think
he minds at all. Everyone asked me what I thought it was but I really did not
have any idea. I am just ecstatic that everything looks great so far, seeing
the four cambers of his heart working was more precious to me than seeing that
“little thing”. As hard and lasting as
the effects of our infertility are and will be, I am grateful for the life
inside of me that I might otherwise take for granted. I am not saying that
others to do appreciation and value their unborn babies, but that because of
infertility I believe I have a different perspective of what is going on inside
of me. I am also aware of how my pregnancy can make other infertile friends
feel, I understand the jealously and anger they may feel. I have been there.
And trust me this is a road that is very difficult to understand from the
outside. I know the emotions others have are not directed towards me but just
the frustration and questioning that comes from infertility. I do not know why
our journey was rather short compared to some; all I know is that we have been
blessed beyond our expectations.
It is starting to feel more real now as it is 2012 and our
little guy will be here before we know it. We have started a registry and are working
on getting the “nursery” set up, he is going to have to share his room with
mommy’s study for now. I have been able to feel him move for about six weeks
now and he certainly likes to move around. He was also able to give his daddy a
Christmas gift of feeling a good “kick”. I know those are things that most
expected mothers love but they are extra important to us. I literally broke
down when Jeremy was able to feel him because there were many days in the past
few years where I thought that would never be possible. It is crazy to think
that we will be able to hold him in just a few more months. He is going to be
one spoiled baby too; he will be the first grandchild on my side of the family.
And his soon to be cousin and he will be vying for that title come spring on daddy’s
side. So not only will we be parents but aunt and uncle come May (or sooner). It
so crazy how fast life can change, and I cannot wait to experience the ups and
downs that parenthood will bring.
Below are a couple “pictures” of our little guy and one of the growing bump.
